More Than Anything
by dreamswideopen
Summary: I never saw it coming. I wasn't prepared. It never occurred to me that she could actually leave, and that I would be alone… again. Sam's POV. Spoilers: iwanna stay with spencer


**I had written this a while ago under a different penname and just recently stumbled a crossed it; I had always liked this piece so I decided to put it up again.**

**this one-shot is something I got from an icarly episode, iwanna stay with spencer. I had been watching that episode and the scene where carly and sam were saying goodbye made me think of this.**

**I always tend to take a deeper meaning from the little things :)**

**oh and I don't own icarly**

More than Anything

I never saw it coming. I wasn't prepared. It never occurred to me that she could actually leave, and that I would be alone… again. I just kind of assumed she'd be around forever. Or maybe I was just hoping. I knew one day she'd probably wise up and realize I was bringing her down. She was always smart and could do anything she put her mind to. Me? Not so much.

We've been best friends for five years now. That's a long time for me, but probably not for her. I never really had friends before Carly. Well, friends that I actually liked and actually liked me. Carly says nothing is going to change, and that we're still going to be best friends. But I know how it works. This may come as a shocker, but I'm not stupid.

Freddie and I are at her house, saying goodbye. It's hard but I can't show that it's killing me that I'm letting her go. She's my only best friend! I don't know what I'll do without her. Carly's the only person that cared enough to tell me what to do. To tell me what was good for me. To tell me I deserved better, when even I thought I didn't.

Carly turned to me, smiling. I wasn't good at saying goodbye. But then again, I've never really said goodbye to someone that I cared about as much as Carly.

I wanted to tell her she was the only reason I wasn't in some juvenile detention center right now. I wanted to thank her for being the only one to ever care about me, to ever care what happened to me. To care enough to take the blame for things she would never do just so I wouldn't get in trouble. I wanted to tell her so many things that I couldn't bring myself to say. I never like to be wrong, or admit that I'm weak. She says that I'm stubborn like that… and she's probably right. Carly's always right. It's something I could rely on. But right now I'm not so sure if everything's going to be ok. For her probably, she can do anything with her life. But not me. I wanted to thank her for everything she's done for me. But I just couldn't.

"So… who's going to take the blame when I put live lobsters in the trunk of Ms. Briggs' car?" I was trying to joke around, to lighten the mood a little. But I didn't think it was working.

She smiled as she shook her head, "Will you at least try to stay out of trouble?"

I wanted to burst out into laughter, but I knew Carly was serious. I guess she knew that no one else would care enough to stop me from getting in trouble. I admire Carly for always trying to keep me on the right path, even when the task was futile. I also admire her for being the only person to ever put me in my place. She's dependable, something solid to stand on. Something I've never had; and I was going to lose that. But, more importantly, I was going to lose my best friend. And I couldn't do anything about it.

I wanted more than anything in the world to tell her I would stay out of trouble. But I couldn't lie to her. Not now. Carly deserved better than that. She always has and always will. I wanted nothing more than for her to stay, but I don't want to make this harder on her. The only thing she wanted from me was for me to stay out of trouble. That's so like her, only concerned with my well being while she's the one that's leaving.

You may wonder why Carly wants me to behave myself. It's quite simple really, Carly knows that she's the only reason I stay out of trouble on most days. Why you may ask? I stay out of trouble for her, because she wants me to. But with her gone… what would be the point? No one would care enough to stop me. So, with all the strength I could muster up, I smiled weakly and reached out to hug her.

Shaking my head slightly, I quietly answered, "No."

**For best friends everywhere**


End file.
